let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
and she was petting her beer can
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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