I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
just tell him i said nine months
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
