mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
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