I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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