you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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