i just wanna soil my oats bro
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
the day after is always just damage control
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
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