Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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