Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
