I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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