i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
