What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize