to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize