that's an acceptable place to lick
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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