where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Randomize
