we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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