in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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