East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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