google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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