**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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