i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
