Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
