Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
love makes seman taste better
people are starting to question the shark bite story
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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