You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
