did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
