a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
When did angry sex become our thing?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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