your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Randomize
