And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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