Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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