What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
