OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Randomize
