If i come over, it means nothing
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
