Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
