nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
