Got a toothbrush?
You're completely useless in the revolution.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
