too bad you live with your parents still
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
only you would photoshop your dick
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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