Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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