I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
