Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize