You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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