Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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