What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
