I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
