I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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