Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize
