Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize