im gay
i know
yea but for you.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
