When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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