good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
why is half of my head shaved?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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