Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
