...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
