If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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