The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
